I met lots of people in this short life, who preached me in pompous tone that ego is bad, money is filth, ladies are evil and etc. That I have had heard umpteen times since childhood, and, interestingly, I came to live a more realistic and down-to-earth life than those who talked about such values publicly in glittering company of like minded souls! I found people, talking about life devoid of ego, the most egocentric souls, chasing name and fame with greater passion than anyone else. I met shrewdness disguised as faithfulness. Friend or beloved, they turned out to be more like poison placed in silver cup.
And still, having seen such worst contradictions, I feel life is a beautiful affair. Life’s canvas still motivates me to live life fully. May be life has some more cruel lessons to offer me! But I am now no more interested in life’s equations similar to one which we notice on chessboard-you win I lose types. In fact, its cruel maneuvers never appealed to my sense instinctively. Precisely, that’s why I have never been passionate admirer of life’s idiotic episodes. My philosophy, until now, has been to deal sincerely with whatever came to cross my path. For me, the very fact that you have arrived in this world of human beings is a big mistake- a divine joke. May be for a greater lot, these changing facets of life turn out to be as important as a life and death issue, but in my eyes, the life mired in deceptiveness at its every turn, does not evoke great concern. I find even the most beautiful episodes of life, have their genesis in some sort of deception. So as I suffer pain, when I come to hear about loss of loved ones, or when I anticipate a blissful episode, the nothingness of life keeps me in state of peace.
Sometimes back I read powerful arguments in favour of death. And one of them stated that death is very much needed since if you continued living, you would realize that people who lived around you as picture of faithfulness were nothing but beings mired in selfishness! Death arrives to retain your illusion. It does you a great favour by keeping your faith intact in flawed people. I am sure had life allowed a legitimate route to embrace death all by oneself, I am sure many would have adopted that path. India’s great revolutionary Bhagat Singh had made a remarkable comment- hanged to death by the British Government in the pre-Independence era- that had he been living, life would have heaped upon him some more chosen scandals. So he is so happy that death has embraced him in the prime of his youth; that death kept his so many vices secret. That’s why he was more happy than sad when hanged to death order was delivered to him. In my eyes, he was the ideal example of these words: “Those whom the gods love die young.”
It’s pathetic that laws of this nation-may be elsewhere too-are strange. They treat suicide a crime. However, the same lawmakers, being devoid of accountability, fail to ensure that people who abetted suicide of innocent person should not go scot-free. The policymakers take no measures to keep away those scenarios, which compel anybody to think about killing oneself. Paradoxically, aiding and abetting suicide, becomes a cause of concern only when someone brings the issue in the court. It’s easy to understand that why it’s never the case. The case in court drags for years and in the end we find the accused denied punishment in want of concrete evidences. So it’s really amusing, and tragic as well, that society first promotes crime and then the same society delivers verdicts. Isn’t that height of absurdity?
Anyway, the pretenders, who unfortunately claim to be my close friends- the ones who are guilty of complicating my simple life, dare to ask me as to why I am not a public figure, why I am not that involved in life’s silly episodes the way they are? Interestingly, they are like the conspirators, standing by your side as a mute spectator, just like you, witnessing the tragedy given birth by them. Since they often dare to ask me such a question with straight face, I need to quote these lines by well known poet Sahir Ludhianvi as a reply to these curious souls-the conspirators:
“क्या मिलिए ऐसे लोगो से जिनकी फ़ितरत छुपी रहे,
नकली चेहरा सामने आये असली सूरत छुपी रही
खुद से भी जो खुद को छुपाये क्या उनसे पहचान करे,
क्या उनके दामन से लिपटे क्या उनका अरमान करे,
जिनकी आधी नीयत उभरे आधी नीयत छुपी रहे।”
“Is there any point in meeting with people, having dubious intentions?
Who project their unreal image, but keep the real one hidden
People, who have kept secret from themselves, too, their own real image
Why should I embrace them, and seek them ?
People who half disclose their intentions, keeping close to their hearts the actual intentions.”
Another brilliant poet, Nida Fazli, has exposed the real elements, which constitute the so-called beautiful episodes of life. These verses in my eyes reveal the reality of life. For a simple person like me, I don’t think that such a cruel world can ever elicit deep attention on my part. It’s another thing that for people of the world, I might look like living, but internally I am on par with dead.
“हर तरफ हर जगह बेशुमार आदमी,
फिर भी तनहाइयों का शिकार आदमी,
सुबह से शाम तक बोझ ढ़ोता हुआ,
अपनी लाश का खुद मज़ार आदमी,
हर तरफ भागते दौड़ते रास्ते,
हर तरफ आदमी का शिकार आदमी,
रोज़ जीता हुआ रोज़ मरता हुआ,
हर नए दिन नया इंतज़ार आदमी,
जिन्दगी का मुक्कदर सफ़र दर सफ़र,
आखिरी साँस तक बेकरार आदमी”
“Everywhere there is sea of people
Yet a person suffers from isolation
Carrying the burdens from morning till evening
Human being has become some sort of moving tomb
Everywhere you find busy roads
Wherein one person becomes victim of other person
Every day a person wakes up only to die a bit more
And still greets each day with great expectations
The destiny of human life from its one episode to another
Is to remain anxious till last breath.”
P.S.: Translation Of The Verses Done By The Author Of This Post.