Let me tender my apology, at the very onset, to enlightened readers, especially the female readers. I could have roped in a more reader-friendly title than such a shocking heading. However, any attempts to do so would have defeated the very purpose of writing such a shocking piece. In my eyes, only hypocrites would call it vulgar, and naturally bring in use the trash button. But even if they decide to use the trash button, I would like them to read the article and try to be on the par with the essence of the whole article. The people around us are day and night bombarding the ear drums with such shocking epithets, and we have, apparently, stopped treating them as offending. If that’s the case then I think there is no point in raising hue and cry about article being objectionable and crude. But the sad reality is that it really hurts when one hears such epithet. So what’s the motive? To make it clear that let’s not make abuses part and parcel of routine conversations. It’s, indeed, a very shocking experience if someone hurls it at you all of a sudden, making you taken aback. If we can use better phrases then why we have made abusive language part of our conversations? And if one is not ashamed of using abuses in conversations then I don’t think one should find anything objectionable in reading them onscreen in an article format!
Another reason why I have written this article is that I love to bring darker aspects of life in open. Let’s get realistic and be not ashamed in reading what we have become used to in our daily lives! One laughs loud to bluff it away or pretends that one did not hear it all when such words appear, all of a sudden, in the daily conversations. I don’t think that’s going to bring any qualitative changes in our mannerism!!!
My idea of writing this article first hit the mind some years back when I was in New Delhi. I came to anticipate these modern mantras very often there. Mind you not only the commoners were using but also the high and mighty uttered them proving that power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Even the teenage girls and boys let fly with tirade of abuses on small pretexts. In the evenings, we used to walk around PVR situated close to Jawahar Lal University (JNU). One gentleman there inquired about Photostat shop. On not being able to locate one he bursted out: “Behan Chod Sirf Cigarette Aur Beer Ki Dukan Hi Delhi Mein Hai Kya? Behen Chod Ek Din Sale Sab Marenge.” (These sister-fuckers have opened shops selling beer and cigarettes. I cannot find any Photostat shop.) He was not all wrong. I could see teenage girls and boys smoking and there were beer bottles scattered around all along the path. If you happen to commute by a DTC bus there, I am sure you would be surrounded by nothing else but choicest abuses. “Behen Chod Ticket Nahi Lega Kya” (Sister-fucker! Will you not have the ticket?) Or “Behan Chold Chal Utar Tera Stoppage Aa Gaya Hai”(Sister-fucker! Get off the bus. You have arrived at the destination.) Interestingly, one US citizen, who was traveling with me, could not resist himself from asking me what these words really mean. He opened his small notebook, wherein he seemed to have jotted down these abuses. I gave a smile and told him that these are foul words.
I had similar experiences when I was in Mumbai. A boy hardly in his teens from a well-to-do family was walking waywardly on a busy street .Obviously, he was drunk. He seemed to have a bitter fight with her girl-friend studying in class seventh! “Behen Chod Mere Saath Nahi Chalegi.Kutiya Kahi Ki ! Khud Dus Logo Ke Saath Ghumti Hai Tab Kuch Nahi Jata.” (Sister-fucker! She hates to be my side. Bitch! She had no problems when she moved with so many strangers.)
I don’t know what’s happening in the Western world but it’s quite clear that there too foul words have become integral part of their routine conversation. I would like to quote a certain excerpt from a dialogue, which took place on a prominent site that deals with publication of poems and short stories. I am also one of its prominent contributors. The best thing of this whole conversation is that it has taken place between two best friends, and that too in a lighter vain. Here is the excerpt: “You fucking idiot!! Tread carefully motherfucker, I can find you and I will not be nice, pray to your imaginary friend now asshole. AIDS? What the fuck do you know? You can only get that from people who are infected with the HIV and without a condom, you fucking idiot. Primitive minded mother-fucker. Go swing out of a tree monkey.” (It’s unedited version of the comment.)
Anyway, I must tell what’s happening in India instead of revealing the darker sides of Western world. Today we are hell-bent on improving the face of Indian police. I don’t know when that’s going to take place. I don’t know how many of us have encountered Policwallah (Policeman) speaking in a friendly way. He is one of the most dreaded species on earth. On very small pretexts, you will find him using foul words. They never miss an opportunity to turn you into a caricature. A friend of mine was returning from a late-night party with his sister. A policeman on the beat asked him to stop. The policeman went closer to them and asked,” Where are you roaming with this Laundiya (Girl)? ” You expect something better from a lady police officer. However, even they are also devoid of good mannerism, better words. They too find nothing wrong in using foul words. Look how they dealt with group of innocent girls brought to book for their alleged involvement in prostitution racket: “Kutiya Dhanda Karti Hai Aur Yeha Aakar Drama Kar Rahi Hai.” (These bitches are involved in prostitution and now they are pretending at the police station.)Well, one expects something better from women officials. But they seem to be setting new standards of degradation!! The lives of policemen hover around foul words, and, therefore, there are endless tales related with their intimate bond with abuses. Recently, some eminent sports persons in Varanasi were manhandled and treated roughly by the petty constables with choicest abuses.
Well, I can say that fast-paced life of ours has wrecked our nerves, to an extent that we have no control over our mouths. As a lawyer, when I first entered in the premises of Allahabad High Court, it felt really great. Indeed, it’s a great place. However, I came to notice that almost all the lawyers enjoyed close proximity with foul words. I came to notice that senior lawyers usually handled their juniors very roughly. Being a rebel of some sort, I refused to be part of this chain of events which my friend tell that it’s essential to face such trials and tribulations to turn into a more practical guy. My other colleagues told me that they (read senior lawyers) are reshaping your tendencies in order to overcome rough moments with ease during the proceedings. However, I ignored their advice. But what they said had an element of truth. If you have witnessed proceedings in divorce related cases, you would come to notice that words like “Kutiya” (Bitch) “Chinar” (Loose character women) , “Randi” (Prostitute) fly thick and fast from both the sides right in front of the Honourable Justice!
Looking this issue from a different perspective, I think that’s why women in our villages during marriage ceremony hurl abuses at the groom’s family when they come to have food. Sometimes they are used as tools to create intimacy, to create familiarity. I have heard that abuses hurled by saints are considered to some form of blessing. Even the prominent Hindi writers and poets are not ashamed in hurling choicest abuses whenever possible. That’s why I feel pretty uncomfortable in their company! But that’s something a natural affair for them. Even prominent Muslim writers like Taslima Nasreen(Lajja fame female writer), Ismat Chugtai and Saadat Hasan Manto have frequently used foul words .
But that cannot be used an excuse to provide an exalted position to Gaali (foul word) in our lives. Let’s come to respect the sense and sensibilities of each other. No doubt it’s very hard to rise above foul words during tense moments but we can certainly avoid making them part of our routine conversations. And some day, we will learn to say the unpleasant things in a refined language. There is no dearth of pleasant words in dictionary. Let’s learn to use them to convey both our good and bad feelings. If that’s not possible, let us use them in rarest of rare times.
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